George Washington - Foundation of a Founder

Here at last are the final 10 of the behavioral maxims so indelibly self-imprinted on our country's first President, and for that matter no doubt, countless other future leaders, many of whom are currently growing in abilities and stature on the MonaVie Team.

101st  Rince not your Mouth in the Presence of Others.

102nd  It is out of use to call upon the Company often to Eat nor need you Drink to others every Time you Drink.

103rd  In Company of your Betters be not longer in eating than they are lay not your Arm but only your hand upon the table.

104th  It belongs to the Chiefest in Company to unfold his Napkin and fall to Meat first, But he ought then to Begin in time & to Dispatch with Dexterity that the Slowest may have time allowed him.

105th  Be not Angry at Table whatever happens & if you have reason to be so, Shew it not but on a Chearfull Countenance especially if there be Strangers for Good Humour makes one Dish of Meat a Feast.

106th  Set not yourself at the upper of the Table but if it Be your Due or that the Master of the house will have it So, Contend not, least you Should Trouble the Company.

107th  If others talk at Table be attentive but talk not with Meat in your Mouth.

108th  When you Speak of God or his Atributes, let it be Seriously & [wt.] Reverence. Honour & Obey your Natural Parents altho they be Poor.

109th  Let your Recreations be Manfull not Sinfull.

110th  Labour to keep alive in your Breast that Little Spark of Celestial fire Called Conscience.

Well, there they are. A few additional table manners and bringing the list to a close, a final strong three regarding spirituality. I need not elaborate, but I cannot resist imploring you dear reader, to pay the closest attention to #110.

I hope that as you read these 110 nuggets of wisdom over the past few weeks, they got you thinking.  I'll wager that most you weren't exposed to these in your history classes in school.  In fact, I'll bet you were taught few of the founding principles, and little if any of the truth about the founding of this great nation.

Would you like a better America?  Then you must become a better American.  And that starts with a better understanding of what made this country great.

As Orrin Woodward said in his article referenced above, "Few people will sit down and slog through a 250 page book on historical, political, religious, or even personal development anymore. I would love to see everyone do so, but in order to create the hunger, Chris and I wrote bite sized morsels to get people thinking in these areas and more."  

Orrin was referring to his book, "Leadership and Liberty" which I highly recommend.  You will find it easy to digest and very illuminating.  Hopefully, it will stir your interest to discover truth!

The Next 20!

Here are the next twenty maxims of George Washington's "Rules of Civility and Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation". Enjoy!

(Ferry Farm, c. 1744)

81st Be not Curious to Know the Affairs of Others neither approach those that Speak in Private.

82nd Undertake not what you cannot Perform but be Careful to keep your Promise.

83rd When you deliver a matter do it without Passion & with Discretion, however mean the Person be you do it too.

84th When your Superiours talk to any Body hearken not neither Speak nor Laugh.

85th In Company of these of Higher Quality than yourself Speak not til you are ask'd a Question then Stand upright put off your Hat & Answer in few words.

86th In Disputes, be not So Desireous to Overcome as not to give Liberty to each one to deliver his Opinion and Submit to the Judgment of the Major Part especially if they are Judges of the Dispute.

87th Let thy carriage be such as becomes a Man Grave Settled and attentive to that which is spoken. Contradict not at every turn what others Say.

88th Be not tedious in Discourse, make not many Digressigns, nor repeat often the Same manner of Discourse.

89th Speak not Evil of the absent for it is unjust.

90th Being Set at meat Scratch not neither Spit Cough or blow your Nose except there's a Necessity for it.

All great - especially #90 during flu season. Now, on to more Table Manners:

91st Make no Shew of taking great Delight in your Victuals, Feed not with Greediness; cut your Bread with a Knife, lean not on the Table neither find fault with what you Eat.

92nd Take no Salt or cut Bread with your Knife Greasy.

93rd Entertaining any one at table it is decent to present him wt. meat, Undertake not to help others undesired by the Master.

94th If you Soak bread in the Sauce let it be no more than what you put in your Mouth at a time and blow not your broth at Table but Stay till Cools of it Self.

95th Put not your meat to your Mouth with your Knife in your hand neither Spit forth the Stones of any fruit Pye upon a Dish nor Cast anything under the table.

96th It's unbecoming to Stoop much to ones Meat Keep your Fingers clean & when foul wipe them on a Corner of your Table Napkin.

97th Put not another bit into your Mouth til the former be Swallowed let not your Morsels be too big for the Gowls.

98th Drink not nor talk with your mouth full neither Gaze about you while you are a Drinking.

99th Drink not too leisurely nor yet too hastily. Before and after Drinking wipe your Lips. breath not then or Ever with too Great a Noise, for its uncivil.

100th Cleanse not your teeth with the Table Cloth Napkin Fork or Knife but if Others do it let it be done wt. a Pick Tooth.

There you have it - And we wondered where our parents came up with their rules for the dinner table. Can't you hear them? .....Get your elbows off the table....don't blow on your soup.....don't talk with your mouth full....  Bet you say the same things to your kids!

I am amazed at how many people haven't been taught good table manners!  I've seen some incredible things sitting across from "folks".  One of my favs is "Lets see how much I can stuff in my mouth!" Why take small bites when you can put it all in there at once?  Is this an efficiency move? Doesn't matter - its disgusting!

As we journey through life, one of the greatest skills we can improve upon is how well we relate with others. There have been some great books written about relatability: "How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People" by Les Giblin and Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" are a couple of classics.  And "Leadership Tidbits and Treasures" by Chris Brady and Orrin Woodward also spring to mind.  Great books all.

 But don't forget - your table manners tell a lot about you! Check yourself here!  

The young George Washington Speaks

I hope you've been examining these maxims from G. Washington's early development and applying them to your own life.  I mean, thats why I've taken the time to put them here.  As I said in my last post, it's our privilege and responsibility to improve and grow - at any age.  How are you doing?

Here are the next 20:

(Ferry Farm, c. 1744)

61st Utter not base and frivilous things amongst grave and Learn'd Men nor very Difficult Questians or Subjects, among the Ignorant or things hard to be believed, Stuff not your Discourse with Sentences amongst your Betters nor Equals.

62nd Speak not of doleful Things in a Time of Mirth or at the Table; Speak not of Melancholy Things as Death and Wounds, and if others Mention them Change if you can the Discourse tell not your Dreams, but to your intimate Friend.

63rd A Man ought not to value himself of his Atchievements, or rare Qualities of wit; much less of his riches Virtue or Kindred.

64th Break not a Jest where none take pleasure in mirth Laugh not aloud, nor at all without Occasion, deride no mans Misfortune, tho' there Seem to be Some cause.

65th Speak not injurious Words neither in Jest nor Earnest Scoff at none although they give Occasion.

66th Be not froward but friendly and Courteous; the first to Salute hear and answer & be not Pensive when it's a time to Converse.

67th Detract not from others neither be excessive in Commanding.

68th Go not thither, where you know not, whether you Shall be Welcome or not. Give not Advice without being Ask'd and when desired do it briefly.

69th If two contend together take not the part of either unconstrained; and be not obstinate in your own Opinion, in Things indiferent be of the Major Side.

70th Reprehend not the imperfections of others for that belongs to Parents Masters and Superiours.

71st Gaze not on the marks or blemishes of Others and ask not how they came. What you may Speak in Secret to your Friend deliver not before others.

72nd Speak not in an unknown Tongue in Company but in your own Language and that as those of Quality do and not as the Vulgar; Sublime matters treat Seriously.

73rd Think before you Speak pronounce not imperfectly nor bring out your Words too hastily but orderly & distinctly.

74th When Another Speaks be attentive your Self and disturb not the Audience if any hesitate in his Words help him not nor Prompt him without desired, Interrupt him not, nor Answer him till his Speech be ended.

75th In the midst of Discourse ask [not of what one treateth] but if you Perceive any Stop because of your coming you may well intreat him gently to Proceed: If a Person of Quality comes in while your Conversing it's handsome to Repeat what was said before.

76th While you are talking, Point not with your Finger at him of Whom you Discourse nor Approach too near him to whom you talk especially to his face.

77th Treat with men at fit Times about Business & Whisper not in the Company of Others.

78th Make no Comparisons and if any of the Company be Commended for any brave act of Vertue, commend not another for the Same.

79th Be not apt to relate News if you know not the truth thereof. In Discoursing of things you Have heard Name not your Author always A Secret Discover not.

80th Be not Tedious in Discourse or in reading unless you find the Company pleased therewith.

Now, go back and read #s 65-70 and 73 again.  I'll bet you know some folks who break #65 all the time - tearing people down with comments and then defend themselves by saying they were "just kidding".  Let me ask this: do you LIKE being around them?

Basic people skills like these are so sadly lacking in most of our socializing aren't they?  Well, why not decide to be the pattern breaker?  Yeah - YOU!

I recommend too that you read Orrin Woodward and Chris Brady's best selling book, "Launching a Leadership Revolution", particularly the section on servant leadership in the Level Three chapter.  By the way, that chapter ends with a fascinating story about George Washington's servant leadership. Read that, and reflect back on these maxims that he made a part of his life.   

George Washington - The Next 20 Maxims

Here are the next twenty maxims of George Washington's "Rules of Civility and Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation". Enjoy!

(Ferry Farm, c. 1744)

41st  Undertake not to Teach your equal in the art himself Proffesses; it Savours of arrogancy.

42nd  Let thy ceremonies in Courtesie be proper to the Dignity of his place [with whom thou conversest for it is absurd to act the same with a Clown and a Prince.

43rd  Do not express Joy before one sick or in pain for that contrary Passion will aggravate his Misery.

44th  When a man does all he can though it Succeeds not well blame not him that did it.

45th  Being to advise or reprehend any one, consider whether it ought to be in publick or in Private; presently, or at Some other time in what terms to do it & in reproving Shew no Sign of Cholar but do it with all Sweetness and Mildness.

46th  Take all Admonitions thankfully in what Time or Place Soever given but afterwards not being culpable take a Time and Place convenient to let him him know it that gave them.

47th  Mock not nor Jest at any thing of Importance break no Jest that are Sharp Biting and if you Deliver any thing witty and Pleasent abtain from Laughing thereat yourself.

48th  Wherein you reprove Another be unblameable yourself; for example is more prevalent than Precepts.

49th  Use no Reproachfull Language against any one neither Curse nor Revile.

50th  Be not hasty to beleive flying Reports to the Disparagement of any.

51st  Wear not your Cloths, foul, unript or Dusty but See they be Brush'd once every day at least and take heed that you approach not to any Uncleaness.

52nd  In your Apparel be Modest and endeavour to accomodate Nature, rather than to procure Admiration keep to the Fashion of your equals Such as are Civil and orderly with respect to Times and Places.

53rd  Run not in the Streets, neither go too s]owly nor with Mouth open go not Shaking yr Arms kick not the earth with yr feet, go not upon the Toes, nor in a Dancing fashion.

54th  Play not the Peacock, looking every where about you, to See if you be well Deck't, if your Shoes fit well if your Stokings sit neatly, and Cloths handsomely.

55th  Eat not in the Streets, nor in the House, out of Season.

56th  Associate yourself with Men of good Quality if you Esteem your own Reputation; for 'tis better to be alone than in bad Company.

57th  In walking up and Down in a House, only with One in Company if he be Greater than yourself, at the first give him the Right hand and Stop not till he does and be not the first that turns, and when you do turn let it be with your face towards him, if he be a Man of Great Quality, walk not with him Cheek by Joul but Somewhat behind him; but yet in Such a Manner that he may easily Speak to you.

58th  Let your Conversation be without Malice or Envy, for 'tis a Sign of a Tractable and Commendable Nature: And in all Causes of Passion admit Reason to Govern.

59th  Never express anything unbecoming, nor Act against the Rules Moral before your inferiours.

60th  Be not immodest in urging your Friends to Discover a Secret.

How about #56? And #58 and #59?  I mean, they're all good, but some really stand out, don't they?  For a bit different look at numbers 58 & 59 - which really speak to being pleasant around people, take the time to read Chris Brady's post of January 5th.

Remember as you read these, that Washington took them seriously enough to write down and follow at a young age. They had a major impact on his character development and his character was the foundation of his leadership abilities. 

Our country is at a crossroads today. What do you think Washington would make of the professional politicians whose greed and lack of character have put us in this position? Remember that you have the power through your vote to change the cast of characters in Washington DC.  You have the privilege and responsibility to educate yourself - to seek the truth and then do something about it.  If you love this country and care about your children and grandchildren, here's a good place to start.

George Washington - the next 20 Maxims

Happy New Year!   Here are the next ten maxims of George Washington's "Rules of Civility and Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation".  I hope you enjoy them!

Ferry Farm, c. 1744

21st Reproach none for the infirmities of Nature, nor Delight to Put them that have in mind thereof.

22nd Shew not yourself glad at the Misfortune of another though he were your enemy.

23rd When you see a Crime punished, you may be inwardly Pleased; but always shew Pity to the Suffering Offender.

24th Do not laugh too loud or too much at any Publick Spectacle.

25th Superfluous Complements and all Affectation of Ceremonie are to be avoided, yet where due they are not to be Neglected.

26th In Pulling off your Hat to Persons of Distinction, as Noblemen, Justices, Churchmen &c make a Reverence, bowing more or less according to the Custom of the Better Bred, and Quality of the Person. Amongst your equals expect not always that they Should begin with you first, but to Pull off the Hat when there is no need is Affectation, in the Manner of Saluting and resaluting in words keep to the most usual Custom.

27th Tis ill manners to bid one more eminent than yourself be covered as well as not to do it to whom it's due Likewise he that makes too much haste to Put on his hat does not well, yet he ought to Put it on at the first, or at most the Second time of being ask'd; now what is herein Spoken, of Qualification in behaviour in Saluting, ought also to be observed in taking of Place, and Sitting down for ceremonies without Bounds is troublesome.

(I must admit some confusion with regard to #27! I'm sure if we had been around 200 years ago, someone would have made it clear to us as to when we could put our hats back on.)

28th If any one come to Speak to you while you are Sitting Stand up tho he be your Inferiour, and when you Present Seats let it be to every one according to his Degree.

29th When you meet with one of Greater Quality than yourself, Stop, and retire especially if it be at a Door or any Straight place to give way for him to Pass.

30th In walking the highest Place in most Countrys Seems to be on the right hand therefore Place yourself on the left of him whom you desire to Honour: but if three walk together the mid[dest] Place is the most Honourable the wall is usually given to the most worthy if two walk together.

31st If any one far Surpassess others, either in age, Estate, or Merit [yet] would give Place to a meaner than himself in his own lodging or elsewhere the one ought not to except it, So he on the other part should not use much earnestness nor offer] it above once or twice.

32nd: To one that is your equal, or not much inferior you are to give the cheif Place in your Lodging and he to who 'tis offered ought at the first to refuse it but at the Second to accept though not without acknowledging his own unworthiness.

33rd They that are in Dignity or in office have in all places Preceedency but whilst they are Young they ought to respect those that are their equals in Birth or other Qualitys, though they have no Publick charge.

34th It is good Manners to prefer them to whom we Speak before ourselves especially if they be above us with whom in no Sort we ought to begin.

35th Let your Discourse with Men of Business be Short and Comprehensive.

36th Artificers & Persons of low Degree ought not to use many ceremonies to Lords, or Others of high Degree but Respect and highly Honour them, and those of high Degree ought to treat them with affibility & Courtesie, without Arrogancy.

37th In Speaking to men of Quality do not lean nor Look them full in the Face, nor approach too near them at lest Keep a full Pace from them.

38th In visiting the Sick, do not Presently play the Physicion if you be not Knowing therein.

39th In writing or Speaking, give to every Person his due Title According to his Degree & the Custom of the Place.

40th Strive not with your Superiers in argument, but always Submit your Judgment to others with Modesty.

What a great one to end this post! 

I wish each of the politicians we have in office today would act with a measure of humility rather than lashing out when anyone dares oppose them - which marks them as having very little emotional intelligence (or should I just leave it as "little intelligence"? Yeah, I think I'll stick with that)

Now, if any of you had a thought of perhaps incorporating any of these into your New Year Resolutions, You might want to take a look at Chris Brady's New Years Eve post on his blog! Good Stuff! And while you're at it, check out Orrin Woodward's New Years Eve post as well.

And, if you're at all interested in any of our first President's other personal papers or documents, here's a good place to start!

George Washington - Character Based Leader
Topic: Leadership
As we close in on the end of a tumultuous political year, I thought it appropriate to review George Washington's "Rules of Civility and Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation".  Is it just me, or does it seem to you that many of our federal politicians - our "Leaders" - have no understanding of the words "civility" and "decent behavior"?  It's either that or that they choose to be boorish.  Many of them have no shame. They tell us outright lies and actually expect that if they tell us whoppers long enough and loud enough, we'll believe them.  Sadly, many do. Sadder yet is the fact that we put these people in office. 

What would the great General, a great leader - our first President - a Man among men -  think of the cast of characters now ensconced in the city called by his name?  Most of Washington's biographers have regarded these 100 Rules as formative influences in the early development of his character. Oh that such men, such leaders, were still being formed in this country today!  Their country needs them very much.  We need to build our lives upon the solid foundation of good character and morals, not just on gifts and abilities. Thank God there exist such folk and institutions who still hold truth dear and are striving to produce leaders like Washington today.  We pray for their success.  

Consider each maxim applicable to the 21st century, and think on the people you elected (or allowed to be elected) to represent you, and ask yourself, does their behavior indicate their agreement or disagreement? What does that say about their character?

Here we are fortunate to glimpse a portion of Washington's studies at about age sixteen - about 265 years ago.  I plan on implementing as many of these maxims as are appropriate for the present time and I invite you to do the same. We'll leave the language, spelling and punctuation as Washington recorded it. Off we go then with the first 20:

1st   Every Action done in Company, ought to be with Some Sign of Respect, to those that are Present.

2d   When in Company, put not your Hands to any Part of the Body, not usualy Discovered.

3d   Shew Nothing to your Frend that may affright him.

4th   In the Presence of Others Sing not to yourself with a humming Noise, nor Drum with your Fingers or Feet.

5th   If You Cough, Sneeze, Sigh, or Yawn, do it not Loud but Privately; and Speak not in your Yawning, but put Your handkercheif or Hand before your face and turn aside.

6th   Sleep not when others Speak, Sit not when others stand, Speak not when you Should hold your Peace, walk not on when others Stop.

7th   Put not off your Cloths in the presence of Others, nor go out your Chamber half Drest.

8th   At Play and at Fire its Good manners to Give Place to the last Commer, and affect not to Speak Louder than Ordinary.

9th   Spit not in the Fire, nor Stoop low before it neither Put your Hands into the Flames to warm them, nor Set your Feet upon the Fire especially if there be meat before it.

10th   When you Sit down, Keep your Feet firm and Even, without putting one on the other or Crossing them.

11th   Shift not yourself in the Sight of others nor Gnaw your nails.

12th   Shake not the head, Feet, or Legs rowl not the Eys lift not one eyebrow higher than the other wry not the mouth, and bedew no mans face with your Spittle, by appr[oaching too nea]r him [when] you Speak.

13th   Kill no Vermin as Fleas, lice ticks &c in the Sight of Others, if you See any filth or thick Spittle put your foot Dexteriously upon it if it be upon the Cloths of your Companions, Put it off privately, and if it be upon your own Cloths return Thanks to him who puts it off.

14th   Turn not your Back to others especially in Speaking, Jog not the Table or Desk on which Another reads or writes, lean not upon any one.

15th   Keep your Nails clean and Short, also your Hands and Teeth Clean yet without Shewing any great Concern for them.

16th   Do not Puff up the Cheeks, Loll not out the tongue rub the Hands, or beard, thrust out the lips, or bite them or keep the Lips too open or too Close.

17th   Be no Flatterer, neither Play with any that delights not to be Play'd Withal.

18th   Read no Letters, Books, or Papers in Company but when there is a Necessity for the doing of it you must ask leave: come not near the Books or Writings of Another so as to read them unless desired or give your opinion of them unask'd also look not nigh when another is writing a Letter.

19th   Let your Countenance be pleasant but in Serious Matters Somewhat grave.

20th   The Gestures of the Body must be Suited to the discourse you are upon.
(Ferry Farm, c. 1744)

Expect a few more in my next post. I want to give enough time to really think these through. 

Quoteables
"The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother."- Josh McDowell

"Truth has no special time of its own.  Its hour is now - always."
- Albert Schweitzer

"It takes a long time to grow an old friend."
- John Leonard

"It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness."
- Confucius

"You can't always go by expert opinion.  A turkey, if you ask a turkey, should be stuffed with grasshoppers, grit and worms."
- Anonymous

Orrin Woodward of Team - Courage

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."- Henry David Thoreau

"A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort."- Sydney Smith

Saw these and was reminded of Orrin Woodward - a man who has the courage to dream.

Why not live the life you imagined? Can you honestly say that today's four meetings at work were about what you reallly value in life? Think back. Think hard.

What will be the reward for all your effort, for all the years of attending meeting after meeting after meeting after meeting? Will you be pushed out without the pension you thought you were going to get? Or will you get a smaller than expected pension to match those ever-diminishing medical benefits? What kind of life will you really have?

You can have the life of your dreams. All that is required is that you make the effort - that you begin to change some things.

That's what Orrin Woodward did. That's what you can do.

All it takes is a little courage.

Orrin Woodard of Team - Choice
William Jennings Bryan said: "Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."

Orrin Woodward made a choice several years ago and created his destiny. And because he did, and because he created a system that you can plug into called the Team, you can choose to create your destiny. You don't create a destiny by waiting for it.

Here are a couple more thoughts to get you started:"Act as if it were impossible to fail."- Dorothea Brande

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one thing."- Abraham Lincoln

Be resolved and get moving. You will win.

Orrin Woodard of Team - Choice
William Jennings Bryan said: "Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."

Orrin Woodward made a choice several years ago and created his destiny. And because he did, and because he created a system that you can plug into called the Team, you can choose to create your destiny. You don't create a destiny by waiting for it.

Here are a couple more thoughts to get you started:"Act as if it were impossible to fail."- Dorothea Brande

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one thing."- Abraham Lincoln

Be resolved and get moving. You will win.